UNPOSTED ORACULARY

Your question was:

O Oracle, so glib, wise and witty,
With thy minions dense, unsmart and twitty,
Canst thou in sooth offer to me thy words:
Wherefore my dog feasteth on cat turds?

And in response, thus spake the Oracle:

I am the very model of a modern Usenet Oracle,
all present and omniscient of all questions categorical,
I specialize on lots of problems dog and cat illogical
especially their diets when it comes to scatological.

Your dog is temporarily eating very awfully,
culturally disgustingly and possibly unlawfully.
Even though you worry she'll succumb to some feline disease;
at least she's eating cat refuse and not her own impurities.

Sorry that my first response was utterly breviloquent --
I've used the Staff of Zot upon the stupid little supplicant.
So now my antiphon is done, and as for any business fees,
you owe the Usenet Oracle a couple pints of Guinness, please.