It only appears at night, flying through the air with horned beasts
at Its command.
It uses some unknown sorcery to infiltrate billions of homes in one
night.
It is not afraid of fire or heat (in chimneys, for instance) or cold
for that matter.
It has beady, coal-black eyes (all pupil, maybe, or perhaps insect-like).
Its bloated midsection wiggles like gelatin (an undead substance made
of decaying animal parts).
It is sometimes called "Old Nick" (which pretends to refer to St. Nicholas,
but is really a nickname [ETP] of the Devil).
Its name is an anagram of Satan Lucas, which sounds very sinister to
me ("the Light of Satan"?).
It spreads Its message of greed and gluttony on the very eve of the
celebration of Christ’s birth.
Indeed, many children believe in Satan Lucas many years before ever
learning of the "true meaning of Christmas", and even then the "true meaning"
is largely ignored, and the evil rites are passed on to another generation.
There is a song about It which begins, "you’d better watch out…"
Its minions, an elaborate network of spying adults, keep tabs on your
behavior throughout the year, and postal services of the world dutifully
deliver reports to It.
In short, Santa Claus is an evil conniving demigod, who has become powerful
enough to control the economy, tempt people to do very wicked actions (all
cloaked in "holiday spirit"), and battle Jesus for control of his own birthday.
The cult of Satan Lucas is growing rapidly. Children are being programmed
to be evil minions when they become adults. Ritual sacrifices of innocent
milk and cookies are offered up to Its obesity. Depression, crime, and
suicides increase during the Christmas hellidays, and no wonder.
Protect yourself. Do not invite this demon into your home. Take down
your stockings. Burn Hanukkah candles to ward It off. Do not give anyone
gifts! This practice only makes It stronger.
Other links - When
I first put up this page, I had no idea that many others saw through Santa's
hideous facade. I show here only some of the many SERIOUS web pages,
as this is much too SERIOUS a matter to be joked about: